Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

1. Why do my parents say they will support me in everything I do, but freak out when it comes to the subject of sex?
Choosing whether to have sex, and when, is a very big decision. The choice you make can change the direction of your life, and the lives of other people too. Parents have the advantage of both positive and negative life experiences that you have not yet acquired, which gives them a perspective very different from yours. The bottom line is that parents want to protect you from making a choice that could hurt you and other people. They want you to be safe. They want you to accomplish things that will make you happy. Parents also raise their children with value systems that they hope their children will cherish as much as they do. Your parents may be afraid that the choice to have sex before you are ready will change your life dramatically and risk your opportunities and happiness.

2. I want to date but I am afraid guys will pressure me to have sex before I am ready. How is a girl supposed to handle that kind of pressure?

  • Attend events in groups, and stay with the group rather than going off alone with someone

  • Stick to public places

  • Avoid alcohol and illegal drugs. Impaired judgement leaves you vulnerable to dangerous situations


    • Someone who truly cares about you won't pressure you to have sex! An estimated 1 in 5 girls in the United States suffers physical and emotional abuse when their companions seek to control and possess them in the dating relationship. Since abuse increases, and usually becomes more violent over time, it is wise to be aware of the following early signs that a person may be abusive:
  • Extreme possessiveness and jealousy
  • Tries to control what you wear, what you do, and how you act
  • Cruelty to animals
  • Unable to handle frustration; explosive anger
  • Isolates you from spending time with friends, or even family
  • Does not respect personal boundaries
  • Puts you down, insults you, and says hurtful things as a way to control your behavior
  • Won't accept breaking up
  • Alcohol and/or drug abuse
  • Comes from a home of abuse and accepts the behavior as normal

    • If you experience any of these warning signs in your relationship, tell someone you trust: your parents, a friend, a counselor, a teacher, etc.
    *National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE

    3. How old do I have to be to go to Family Planning? What are my rights?
    You may access Family Planning services if you are of reproductive age; in other words, if you are able to get pregnant, or to get someone pregnant. Additionally, a minor who is fourteen years of age or older may consent to STD/HIV testing and treatment without prior consent of parent or legal guardian.

    4. Why do women have pelvic exams and pap smears?
    A pap smear is not required to get started on a birth control method. However, if you are sexually active you need to take care of your sexual health, and having regular pap smears is an important part of that. A pap smear checks for signs of cervical cancer. Pelvic exams are done to check the reproductive organs.

    STD checks are an important part of your exam. If you are sexually active, it is a good idea to have screening tests for sexually transmitted diseases. It is not automatically done with your annual pap, so be sure to request the STD screening. If you believe you may have been exposed to an STD, you should schedule an appointment to be tested; don't wait until your pap is due!

    5. Do pelvic exams hurt?
    It may be a little uncomfortable, but you should feel pressure...not pain. Speak up if it hurts!

    6. What does it cost to raise a child to adulthood?
    Below are a couple of web sites that will allow you to calculate an estimate of the cost of raising a child.

  • Bankrate.com
  • BabyCenter

    • 7. What does the law require of a guy if he gets a girl pregnant?
    At the very least, you are required to pay child support until the child is 18 years old. Laws vary from state to state.